Today is International Women’s Day.
On my way to work, my thoughts seemed to dart to many different subject lines.
These thoughts included a very important person that has moulded the way I reflect upon life, friendship, loyalty and perhaps some things that are a little murky and I’m still trying to sort out.
Our mom is a very vibrant 97 years young and at the end of the 2016 she started to feel a bit off her game.
It all started around Christmas and we didn’t interact with any family members because of that (nothing wrong with a quiet holiday season). Her confidence seemed a bit shaken as she struggled with a bad leg that had her quite concerned.
With a few weeks of bed rest in hospital she seems to have recovered nicely. Nothing like a little TLC when you need it.
Of course, when you approach a certain level of seniority, people start to think about the next step and in some cases it feels like being completely written off. Especially when people talk AROUND you and not TO you!
I like to remain up beat, but sometimes we’re fragile in how loved ones are seen, treated and the loss of their status in our world is disheartening.
This is a story that you want to approach with an open mind, but it is hard. People are after all only doing their jobs. Places are built to assist an aging population and not everyone is following the same life path. There is protocol after all.
Having spent time in hospital surroundings since the end of January, I give credit to nurses and assistants that work with patients and residents. Many of these people have families involved in a positive way. Some families maybe demanding or some just don’t care anymore. It is hard to see a father, mother or anyone in your family go through this. You feel helpless. I know that these institutions are there to help people. However, when you go into such a place and you are capable of so much more, where does that leave your psyche.
I find my spirit going to a rather dark, unsettled place thinking of our Olive being somewhere that strips her of freedom to bake, socialize and be a vital part of what happens in her children, grand and great-grandchildren’s lives. Not to mention her friends that are missing her cheery voice.
She has always joked, half heartedly, that we would not be putting her in a home! Well, by being tired out, she has, in a matter of speaking, done this on her own!
The waiting period for places that are a bit above the base – grade are up to 5 years. Consideration of being on a list to a care facility is one thing, but being forced to endure the loneliness of being somewhere you don’t really want to be is another.
Mom’s parting words yesterday afternoon were: “go on, don’t worry, I’m tougher than this”.
Our family and mom’s friends are visiting her, but she like all of us needs a job to stay sane. That job is being mom and not just sitting in a room waiting for your next meal. Its baking, helping with dishes or visiting, gardening, writing letters and singing hymns at church.
You aren’t where you should be
Olive plans on making it to 100! I think she will. Her sister Lavina is 99 on the 10th. And Elva is right there too.
On this International Women’s Day – there is only one woman I want to think of, in high regard. Olive H. Evans